[CBFF] Daily South Town: The Bears vs Da Bears

[Steve Behrens]

The Bears and Da Bears
1985+2006 Dream Team: It's just about even

November 12, 2006

You want to know what the greatest single lie of the Bears' season has been?

OK, here it is:

"You can't compare these Bears to the Super Bowl Bears."

It has come in several, equally annoying variations, among them: "It's silly
to compare the '06 Bears to the '85 Bears," or "There's no comparison
between these Bears and those Bears," or "Dikka could crush Lovie's skull
with his mustache, my friend."

Actually, I like that last one best, because that is the essence of sports.
We argue and we make bold claims and we back our guys and, yes, we make
comparisons, all while awaiting -- and occasionally during -- the games.

That's why we ask what Babe Ruth might be able to hit in a game that
includes players of several hues, setup men, closers and sliders. (My guess:
.325, 40, 120.)

That's why we wonder if Bill Russell would have still been a great center
today at 6-foot-9. (No. He would have been a great forward.)

That's why we consider Marciano, Louis or Ali as carefully as we consider
Rachel, Monica or Phoebe. (Louis and Rachel.)

Of course we can compare the current Bears to the Super Bowl champs of yore.
You may not do it favorably, especially after last week, but you may
compare.

I have, and frankly, the results surprised me.

Granted, I may have painted myself into a conceptual corner. The deal was
this: If I could put the '85 Bears in a time machine and transport them to
Halas Hall, how many of the 22 offensive or defensive starters would bump
the current Bears to the bench?

Would you believe 12? Well, with some creative lineup making, 11. If we
start goofing around with special teams, I get back to a dozen.

Any of those numbers seems insane. These guys haven't won anything. Those
guys won it all.

Still ...

Since defense makes both these teams, let's start there.

*RIGHT END:* Richard Dent over Alex Brown, even if Dent took a play off now
and again.

*RIGHT TACKLE:* My team, my rules. Both William "Refrigerator" Perry and
Tank Johnson take a seat. I'm moving Dan Hampton from left end on the '85
team (which isn't a stretch since the Hall of Famer played a ton of tackle).

*LEFT TACKLE:* Tommie Harris gets the nod over Steve McMichael. At 295,
Harris is a better match against today's behemoth offensive linemen than the
265-pound McMichael, who still gets a spot in my rotation coming off the
bench.

*LEFT END:* I moved Hampton so I could keep Adewale Ogunleye on the field.

*LINEBACKERS:* Mama's Boy Otis is one of a kind, all right. He's the only LB
from the Super Bears to grab a seat. My trio is Mike Singletary in the
middle and Wilber Marshall and Brian Urlacher wherever Ron Rivera sees fit
(yeah, he gets the gig over Buddy Ryan, mostly to see the look on Ryan's
face).

*RIGHT CORNERBACK:* A very, very tough choice. Les Frazier (6 picks and 52
tackles in '85) or Nathan Vasher (8 picks, 57 tackles last season). Vasher,
for big-play potential.

*LEFT CORNERBACK:* Mike Richardson in another close one over Peanut Tillman.
In a four-season span, Richardson had seasons of five, four and seven
interceptions. Tillman needs six picks in the last eight games to match
that.

*SAFETIES:* Dave Duerson gets the job at strong safety because Mike Brown is
hurt and Gary Fencik beats out rookie Danieal Manning at free. But if Rivera
wants to, we could move Urlacher to safety, sit one of the old guys and
bring Lance Briggs in at linebacker.

And now the offense.

*QUARTERBACK:* Until the Miami game, I was leaning toward Rex Grossman. I
snapped out of it. Jim McMahon's poise under pressure and offensive
coordinator mind wins the gig over the more physically gifted
whippersnapper.

*RUNNING BACK:* Walter Payton over anyone in the history of the NFL.

*FULLBACK:* To have Payton running behind someone other than Matt Suhey
wouldn't seem right.

*LEFT TACKLE:* Jimbo Covert has to start eating. He may be giving up 2
inches and 37 pounds to the 6-foot-6, 312-pound John Tait, but there's no
way I'm not giving this should-be Hall of Famer a spot on my line.

*LEFT GUARD:* Speaking of Hall of Famers, eight-time Pro Bowler Ruben Brown
gets the nod over Mark Bortz. (Brown's extra 25 pounds don't hurt, either.)

*CENTER:* My first modern-era, size-as-tiebreaker pick. Olin Kreutz has been
to two fewer Pro Bowls than Jay Hilgenberg's seven, but he weighs 292 pounds
to Hilgenberg's 265.

*RIGHT GUARD:* Go ahead and hammer me for this one, but I'm taking a
305-pound Roberto Garza over the 280-pound Tom Thayer.

*RIGHT TACKLE:* Keith Van Horne too small? Yes. At 6-7 he's the same height
as Fred Miller, but Miller wins the weigh-off 314-285.

*TIGHT END:* Desmond Clark easily over Emery Moorehead.

*WIDE RECEIVERS:* I wish either Dennis McKinnon or Muhsin Muhammad were a
burner, because then I could start both of them. But since Bernard Berrian's
injury showed us the importance of a speed receiver just last weekend, I've
got to take World Class Willie Gault. Muhammad, among the league's top 50 in
career receptions and yards, gets the slightest of nods over McKinnon, who
was a great blocker as well as a fearless receiver.

So what's left?

Well, let's see: My kickers are Mr. Perfect Robbie Gould and Brad Maynard
over Kevin Butler and Maury Buford. I'll take Gault returning kickoffs and
(gulp) Devin Hester as my punt returner over Ken "I Swear to God I Don't
Remember This Guy" Taylor.

*COACH:* Until I hear Lovie Smith accuse the McCaskeys of "throwing nickels
around like manhole covers," I've gotta stick with Da Coach.

*COLUMNIST:* This one's easy. Bill Gleason, if he can deal with no smoking
in the press box, he gets the gig.

*Phil Arvia can be reached at parvia at dailysouthtown.com or (708) 633-5949.*