[CBFF] Ahhhrrrgh!!! Rex is back :: CHICAGO SUN-TIMES :: Jay Mariotti - Sent Using Google Toolbar

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Ahhhrrrgh!!! Rex is back :: CHICAGO SUN-TIMES :: Jay Mariotti

Ahhhrrrgh!!! Rex is back
Turning the offense over to the Turnoversaurus has wasted the best
years of a championship defense, so why bring him back?


February 24, 2008
BY JAY MARIOTTI Sun-Times Columnist

Have you ever seen such a sorry quarterback hold a city hostage for so
long? Welcome to Year Six of Turnoversaurus Rex, an experiment that
should have ended last season but is prolonged to ad nauseum by an
organization of dubious competence. What the Bears see in Rex
Grossman, I have no idea, but all we see is a flub machine who has
spent his last 24 regular-season games throwing 27 interceptions and
committing 14 fumbles.

And that stretch, frighteningly enough, encompassed some of his finest moments.



» Click to enlarge image
The Bears remain hopeful that flub-prone Rex Grossman is an NFL quarterback.
(AP)


RELATED STORIES A square-off deal for Rex Grossman agrees to one-year
contract ``It is a body of work. There have been some highs and some
lows, but we think Rex is a good football player and I choose to
remember more of those highs,'' said Lovie Smith, whose baffling
thought process belies the projected wisdom of his new salt-and-pepper
beard. ``I still don't think he has peaked yet. I still think his
future is bright.''

Recalling his major at the University of Florida as -- giggle here --
travel and tourism, I might forecast a bright future for Grossman if
he became a hotel concierge. But as the player who fills the most
important position on a team that has won just one of the 42 Super
Bowls, he makes nine million people reach collectively for a vomit
bag. Like Rod Blagojevich and Steve Dahl, Rex exists solely as a civic
irritant, extending the agony of Bears fans who may not live long
enough to experience a franchise quarterback playing for the NFL's
charter franchise. Bringing back Grossman is the equivalent of hanging
a huge white flag over Soldier Field, not to mention a reason to pause
when Halas Hall announces an across-the-board increase of ticket
prices.

Do you really want to pay between $68 and $108 for regular seats, or
$245 to $350 for club seats, to watch an Arena League passer?

The Bears are in deep doo-doo. They have no quarterback, no running
back, no wide receivers and a crumbling offensive line. They've
royally botched the Lance Briggs soap opera and likely will lose him
in free agency. Brian Urlacher is breaking down, a victim of
relentlessly throwing his body around like a pinball for eight
seasons. They are desperate enough to ponder inviting back Mike Brown,
a brave man who has the health reliability of Humpty Dumpty. With the
Packers and Vikings clearly better in the NFC North, the least the
Bears could have done was shake up the QB jumble as they settle into
mediocrity.

Maybe Donovan McNabb isn't available. But did general manager Jerry
Angelo even try to cut a deal for a local native who would have
injected excitement and drama, if not championship hope? The pool is
thin in free agency, but didn't Billy Volek look good in winning a
playoff game for the Chargers after Philip Rivers got hurt? Wouldn't a
change of pace with Volek make more sense than the same old Rex? It
would have been best for all parties had the Bears allowed Grossman to
seek free-agent employment elsewhere. Instead, they gave him a lowball
that amounts to a slap in the face -- a one-year deal for $3 million,
with $2 million more in incentives if he starts -- and he shockingly
took it after only a few hours of wrangling. Such an embarrassingly
puny deal should remind everyone of Grossman's bottom-feeder standing
in the league, yet the Bears still are willing to let him compete for
a starting role against The Neckbeard, Kyle Orton. As a quarterback
controversy, it's not exactly Joe Montana vs. Steve Young.

``Rex understands it. He's fine with it,'' said Angelo, as if Grossman
would have any reason to expect a silver platter. ``Obviously, we want
to get the best player under center. Kyle did some good things at the
end. I think he deserves the right to compete at the position. I don't
see this dragging out into the season. We will have a pretty good feel
as we already do about the guys and what the tiebreaker is, and that
has to be determined by the coaches.''

Angelo should be ashamed. His reputation as a talent evaluator,
largely hit and miss anyway, fades a little more with each year he
stands behind Grossman. He has wasted an era of championship defense
because -- all together now -- he can't get the QB right. In his seven
years on the job, the Bears have changed starters at the position 23
times. It should have been clear at the beginning of last season, when
Rex sabotaged the team's supposed Super Bowl hopes with bad
performances, that he isn't the answer. But Angelo and Smith cling to
the fantasy that Grossman finally can break through like Eli Manning,
conveniently ignoring that Manning is 6-4 with famous bloodlines while
Rex is generously listed at 6-1 and barely can see over his linemen.

``We wanted him because we feel like he gives us the best opportunity
to be the best team we can be going into this next season," Angelo
said Saturday.

``Rex has won a lot of football games for us around here," Smith said.

Yeah, and he also lost a Super Bowl by his lonesome.

My concern is that the Misers of the Midway are back. More than $30
million below the salary cap, the Bears are in position to buy, buy,
buy and fill numerous needs. But it's unlikely they've satisfied
Briggs, Bernard Berrian and Brendon Ayanbadejo with free-agent offers,
meaning agent Drew Rosenhaus might pull off a triple exodus. Will this
franchise actually have the audacity to go on the cheap after rasing
ticket prices? Sure sounds like it.

``The thing you have to do is create sobriety in the marketplace,"
Angelo said at the NFL scouting combine. ``Because you have the money
doesn't mean you have to spend the money. You have to put values on
players and then you have to stay disciplined to that, or else you're
unable to keep all these players.''

Is that Angelo? Or Michael McCaskey in disguise?

``If money is the bottom line, I don't want that player," Angelo said.
``I want guys who want to be here. The numbers we put in front of our
players are very good numbers, very fair numbers. Could somebody blow
us out of the water? Certainly, they can. But I'm not letting that
team rule our thinking. That's where the sobriety comes in.

``We'll have to have confidence in ourselves, in our coaches. If you
don't operate that way, you are truly going to be a train wreck.''

Guess what, Jerry? You already are a train wreck. And Rex is still the
engineer.

All aboard.